This week's musical tribute has us seeing double!
By Jim Cantiello
Chord Overstreet and Dianna Agron in "Glee"
Photo: FOX
This week's "Glee" once again pitted the gleeks against each other — and paired them up — as they performed duets and competed for a gift certificate at Breadsticks. That amazing restaurant hasn't made its way to Times Square yet, but Jim got into the spirit anyway and recruited a very special partner for this week's "Glee"-cap. Sing along!
"When you're different, when you're special, sometimes you have to get used to being alone." — Kurt Hummel
Jim 1: Duets
Jim 2: Duets
Jim 1: Secrets
Jim 2: Duets
Jim 1: Don't fret.
Jim 2: Don't you fret.
Jim 1: I won't forget
Jim 2: We won't forget
Together: To recap "Glee."
Jim 1: This week Mr. Schue assigned they split off into doubles.
Jim 2: Bribed 'em with free dinner so there's drama for the couples.
Jim 1: Mike and Tina having issues, they almost nearly split.
Jim 2: In the end it wasn't them who won the gift certificate.
Jim 2: [Spoken] The new guy and Quinn win!
Jim 1: [Spoken] Shh! Spoiler alert!
Jim 2: Kurt is feeling lonely, needs a boyfriend really bad,
Jim 1: Wants to duet with the new guy,
Jim 2: "But he's not gay,"
Jim 1: ... says Kurt's dad,
Jim 2: So instead a solo "Victor/Victoria" is what Kurt sings.
Jim 1: But, "Glee," sexuality and gender are two different things.
[Jims sing together]
Duets bring out everybody's worst,
Animosity in bursts,
They fiend for breadsticks and go nuts!
There's scheming
Cheerleaders hooking up,
Two girls without a cup.
They're not lesbians, just sluts!
Jim 2: It was a night that Artie won't forget too soon.
Jim 1: Brittany carried him, then mounted him and took him to the moon.
Jim 2: But when he found out she was using him just for his voice,
Jim 1: Artie pulled out of the duet tête-à-tête by choice.
Jim 2: [Spoken] If only he pulled out the night before.
Jim 1: [Spoken] Ha! Now that's funny.
Jim 2: [Spoken] Thanks!
Jim 1: So the new guy's getting Slushied everywhere he tries to go.
Jim 2: Finn and Rachel throw their chances so he doesn't quit the show.
Jim 1: New guy teaches Quinn how to play guitar and rock out,
Jim 2: But she freaks when he goes in to get some action with his co-- out.
[Jims sing together]
Secrets
Haunt the new guy every day,
But it isn't that he's gay,
Just that he tried to dye his hair.
He showers
More than anyone I know,
But if I had his torso
I'd also always be that bare.
[Spoken]
Jim 2: Jim?
Jim 1: Yes, Jim!
Jim 2: Here's something I'm pondering. His hair color's a lie, but shouldn't somebody have spied that the carpet and the drapes don't exactly jive?
Jim 1: You're embarrassing me.
Jim 2: You're embarrassing me.
[Jims sing together]
And that was "Glee!"
What did you think of last night's "Glee"? Share your (non-musical) reviews in the comments!
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